Tails From Beyond -- Giving New Meaning To The Word PoopyheadA long believer in the spirit world and afterlife ("can you imagine if this is all there is for us in this lifetime," a dear friend once asked me?), I have experienced many a moment after the death of a loved one, human or animal that can't be anything but a sign from beyond, or is it? I'll leave it up to you to decide on that one.What now seems as another lifetime ago I lost my partner Manny during the height of the AIDS crisis in the early 1990's. A devastating time for all of us who lived through that horrific holocaust. He passed on December 27th. A Christmas I would never ever forget. We were then and I still am today a lover of all things Christmas. Those of you who know me can vouch for this. We always had the biggest trees to adorn with our even bigger ornament collection. The trees would sway under the weight of crate after crate of collected ornaments. That Christmas was no different. The tree sparkled in its full glory for all to see. The only annual nagging issue was there always seemed to be that one ornament, you know the one. Probably one that someone had regifted to you as a gift, and like the crazy Aunt in the family that no one wanted to sit next to, we were always a little embarrassed to have it sit in between our most prized and most fun family of ornaments. It was also a sacrilege not to put every ornament on the tree. Kind of like no ornament left behind, we had to put it on. It was this little odd piece, purple in color, and just downright ugly but up it went, year after year. This year it was stuck high up on the back of the tree nestled deep in the branches. God forbid it would be seen and someone would call it out loud.After his funeral and after the last calls had come in and the last people had stopped by, I lay in bed exhausted and drained with our dog Mimi at my side. I was talking out loud to Manny cursing him for leaving me so soon and that I hoped he was a peace. I asked him to send me a sign if he could, proving to me that he was indeed ok. Which would make me ok. In no more than 5 minutes later I heard this sound from the other room. A tinkly-tink, crash sound that I could only guess was an ornament falling from the tree. I wasn't that concerned for I was familiar with that sound. (I always allow a margin of error each year for a few ornaments to break either from improper packing from the year before or user error when hanging them on the tree. Plus it's an excuse to buy new ones.). I got up and went to the living room to survey the damage and of course as I saw with my own eyes, there it was. That one and only ugly ornament that we secretly despised every year had fallen off the tree and broke into a thousand pieces. I laughed and cried as I swept it up and looked up to the ceiling and said "good one Manny, thank you."I knew he was ok.Last night, as my partner Jeff and I sat for dinner, we shared a few of our favorite Butch stories with each other. For earlier that day we had to put Butch, our Boston Terrier down. Butch aka Poopyhead had fought his long battle of illness and age and the time came for us to put our big boy parental boots on let him go and end his suffering. He was my companion for the last six years, always by my side doing nothing but loving me each and every day. Our eyes swollen and red we cried and tried to smile through chewing and swallowing our cold fast food. Jeff told the story of when, before I had come into the picture of the night Butch got into it with a skunk outside in the backyard. You know who won that battle as Butch ran inside and under the bed rolling into the shag carpeting to try and de-stink himself. Jeff told me both Butch and the house stunk for a week. I then told Jeff I had been looking for my sign from Butch since earlier in the day that he was ok and shared stories with him of previous experiences I had during these times of great loss. My spiritual teachers of this world taught me the spirit is the strongest right after they pass from their earthly bodies. The thing I love about my partner is he allows me to have my own beliefs even if he doesn't share in them himself. He just nods and loves me whatever comes out of my mouth or mind. Most of it anyways. 😛I climbed into bed to rest as I'm also recovering from recent back surgery. I have to get into bed a certain way now which requires a bit of skill, gymnastics, and luck as not to disturb anything my back surgeon skillfully put back together. Once I got into perfect position it hit me. That smell. It was a skunk. I've now lived in Palm Springs for almost 6 years and to my memory I've smelled a skunk maybe twice but far off in the distance with minimal stench by the time it hits our house. All of a sudden that putrid smell starting wafting under the patio door into our bedroom where I lay in the fetal position propped with pillows, heating pad, and remote control in hand. I started to dismantle my pillow fort and move to the edge of the bed thinking it was outside the door as it was so strong and it had to be close. I hobbled to the door and squeaked it open. It smelled like a hundred skunks had sprayed the side of the house. I yelled to Jeff who came a running to make sure I wasn't going crazy and he indeed verified that it was a skunk and he hadn't smelled anything like that since the night Butch got sprayed maybe 8 years ago now. I just started to cry and smile and laugh all at once for this had to be Butch no? What are the chances that on this night, after we had just talked about his story, just said goodbye to our dog, asked him to send me a sign, and we hadn't smelled or seen a skunk in almost a decade that this would happen now?I ran back inside to get my camera as I was going to record myself laughing outside at the smell, you know, just for fun or for social media. Jeff went to call his ex to share the story with him and by the time I wobbled back outside would you believe the smell was gone. Completely 100% gone without a trace of skunk smell anywhere to be sniffed. It took my breathe away as I stood there stunned. In complete and utter disbelief. I looked to the heavens, tears down my cheeks, and did what anyone would do in that tender other-worldly moment. I yelled "Butch, you Poopyhead, you Stink!"And he did.jf (one of Butch's humans)
50 Days 'Til 50 Day 39 Tails From Beyond
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